It's hard to tell when you're moving from the middle of the ocean.
When you are so far out that you can't see land, you can't discern that you are actually moving in the intended direction.
Experienced pilots from the Polynesian areas can follow currents to navigate. Astrolabes,, and now satellites, can pinpoint the ship's location now.
But, as a traveler, a sailor, on board a vessel, you can only feel the wind in your face, the pressure and variance of the water, as you sail along.
As a traveler, you can only have faith that you are moving correctly.
We know what happens when the crew loses faith: mutiny. Then the mutineers must be trusted to sail in the best direction.
Can you see a theme here?
We are all ships at sea, often away from the sight of shore. Occasionally we will see the lighthouses in our path, showing us the way.
Yet we are all involved in a big adventure called life.
We can't always see ahead. Parents who have special needs children are perpetually confronted with issues they never foresaw. Will the school help? Who is standing in the way of their child receiving appropriate services? Which of the parents' friends will support them, and who will drift away? Which of the child's peers will be kind, and who will be harsh?
In the same way, we only have confidence that we know our path when everything is going well. Our careers are predictable, our families are happy, and we have friends.
But that can all change in an instant. Have you known someone who lost a spouse unexpectedly, suddenly? Have you suffered through "outplacement" and experienced your colleagues distancing themselves from you?
Life is like this.
How, then, do we navigate when we can't see the shore?
First, accept that life is full of oddities and unpredictable circumstances. We can't always predict; we can't always plan for all circumstances.
Second, stand tall. We all must have confidence to know that WE are the best one to live through this challenge. No matter how painful, we can survive everything the world may throw at us.
Third, gather friends. Find the time to make that call, have that lunch, meet for supper, go to a game. Connection to others is essential to our entire well-being.
Next, tend to your spiritual side. If through religion or through walks in nature, your habit must be regular in order to nurture that part of yourself. (If you are The Caregiver, reach out to the support groups in your area, or the national ones, to find help.)
And lastly, claim your Intention for each day. Intention is not about a list, but about deciding on attitude and response in advance of the day's activities. We are all susceptible to burnout, and intention + connection are tools for prevention.
All these are probably obvious to you, but here's one that might not be; when times are tough, find a therapist. Everyone needs an unaffiliated, unbiased, outsider who can give us perspective when it seems that the world has brought only storms.
Hugs to you all!
